RedBlueThoughts

Today, I will try to end my relationship with Anna. Yes, its official. I am ending this 5 month tale. Its a bittersweet one. I don’t want to taste of it anymore. I’ve tried my best. Yet, my best is not enough. I’ve gotten tired of this drama. I’ve stressed myself out completely that sometimes, I don’t know myself anymore. I’ve enslaved myself too much and too hard that it already affected my job.

Today, I will call her parents and tell them my decision. Its a sad yet definitive one. God knows that I’ve tried. But, I can’t take this shit any longer. It has gotten on my nerves already. I came back to rectify. I admitted my previous mistake and would want to really change. But, Anna does not want me to change. They want revenge. And they are just waiting for the right time to strike. Am I foolhardy to believe that they want this? And that they are not savage people? When I visited them sometime ago, I overheard one of the kids kidding Anna’s father that “Richard is here. I thought you’ll gonna kill him.” Anger…err…nay…loathe…that’s the right term…is still there in their hearts. They’ll too proud. They were put to shame four years ago, yes, but its already 2007! My God, these people!

Anyway, if that’s my lot, then, i have to accept it. Today, marks the spot. I will end it. I will definitely end it. Why?

How can I trust somebody who hates me with all her heart? She has’nt forgotten the past and definitely, will not be able to. Will you dare sleep with her in one bed? Will you not think twice eating the food that she prepares for you? Will you even dare step inside the house with her in it? Marriage is about trust. If you can’t entrust your life with the person whom you love, its useless right? Why struggle when you cannot even change their mindsets anymore.

They lust for my blood. They see red. This is a useless and hopeless exercise. Its futile. Nada. Why waste time, resources, effort and all my intellect to think about resolving this? Its unresolvable. Its useless. Nothing to hope for.

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